Bedtime

I found myself in a struggle the other night between selfish nature and motherly love.  It wasn't the first time, but this time struck me differently.  

I often find great relief when the kids are all tucked in bed and on their way to slumber, and I can finally use my brain for other things, or just to get to choose what to do or at what pace.  Even when I’m not doing something for myself, per se, like making a grocery list or putting together sandwiches for lunches, at least I am doing it while absorbed in my own thoughts and without interruption.  Or, even better, while carrying on adult conversation with my husband.

So when that interruption came, I sighed and wondered how long this would take out of my time tonight.   

And then came the request:  Lucy told John from the top of the stairs that she just wanted to snuggle with mommy.   

*sigh*

As hard as it is to give up the few moments each night that I get to myself, and as much as my mind already was recalculating what I could or could not accomplish tonight before I went to bed, I found my way upstairs to her bedroom.  She scooted over and made room for me with a sweet smile, and I settled in next to her and rubbed her back and stroked her hair.  And then I was overcome with emotion (and admittedly a little guilt) for my selfish thoughts from moments before.  I became very sad that I had begrudged this precious time that my daughter requested with me.  But my now eight-year-old is growing up.  In a few years she probably won’t ask me to come snuggle with her anymore.   

Heaven, help me.

I don’t remember what age it was for me, but I have a very clear memory of the first time I told my mom that I would put myself to bed and that she didn’t need to tuck me in.  I wonder if she rejoiced or cried. Or maybe a little of both.

That day is coming for Lucy, too.  Sometimes, when I am answering the endless bedtime requests, I can hardly wait.  And others, like this night, I feel it will be far too soon.   

And so I gratefully and lovingly snuggled with my daughter who needs me—who wants me—and quietly mourned the coming day when I no longer hear the voice at the top of the stairs after bedtime.  I just pray that I have answered her call often enough that she knows I am always here for her, and she can always ask.

Pin-Worthy

I've been hearing the hype for a while now about a certain website that acts as a bulletin board for everything and anything on the internet. This is probably not the first time you've heard of Pinterest.

The accolades often sounded like this: "I found this AMAZING recipe on Pinterest and now I'm being asked to audition for the next Top Chef!" Or this: "Got this FABULOUS craft idea from Pinterest and it kept my kids busy for 8 hours today!" Or this: "A new parenting tip I saw on Pinterest is practically raising my kids for me!"

Well, those might be slight exaggerations. But what kept me away from exploring this miracle-making site were comments more like this: "I wasted so much time in Pinterest today that we're having cold cereal for dinner." Or this: "I discovered Pinterest yesterday and so completely neglected every other responsibility in my life for the last 24 hours." Or this: "I spend so much time pinning things to do that I don't actually have time to DO any of it."

Or something to that effect.

So I joined. Or rather, I requested an invitation. And three days later they emailed to invite me to join their elite society of "pinners." (Do they do a background check or something?? So strange.)

One week later, it certainly has proved to be something on which I must deliberately limit my time. I could spend hours exploring possible recipes and birthday party ideas and decorating techniques and crafty how-to sites.

But I've also found some really practical stuff that I've already used, and I just had to share a few things from our weekend that all involved some fabulous ideas I found on Pinterest.

First, with Valentine's Day coming up, I showed Lucy a couple of fun ideas of things we could do for her classmates. We settled on one, went out for supplies, and spent a good part of Saturday lovingly making these gifts for her friends and teachers.

After 10 minutes in a 250-degree oven the crayon pieces looked like this:

And after cooling in the pan for a half hour, we flipped them onto parchment paper.

And the finished product, with Lucy's loving touch:

(We had to make sure they knew that, unlike most of their Valentines, it was not to be eaten.)

If I ever do this project again, I will use fewer of the dark colors, but Lucy was still delighted with how they turned out.

While the hearts were melting (oh, that's a pretty funny pun!), the kids stayed busy thanks to an idea involving a 77-cent roll of masking tape and our family's plethora of matchbox cars.


The kid-fun was great, but I can't neglect to mention the many drool-worthy recipes I have found on Pinterest. I tried a super easy recipe for Broccoli Cheddar Soup that did not involve an immersion blender or any bizzare ingredients. The kids even loved it, and hubby and I fought over the leftovers. It rivals Panera's soup of the same name, though I don't think I can beat their bread bowls. I'll be making a double batch next time.

I didn't get a photo of the soup. But I did take a picture of this:

Our Valentine treats at home were red velvet cupcakes from a box with homemade cream cheese frosting. And yes, I found the recipe for that on Pinterest, too. (Only 3 ingredients!: 8 ounces of softened cream cheese, 3 cups of powdered sugar, and 2 teaspoons of vanilla -- totally makes the boxed mix worth eating!)

So as I carefully bide my time on a site that is endless with ideas, I'm grateful for the practical inspiration I have found so far.

Just thought I'd share...


[NOTE: This is not a paid advertisement. No goods or services were promised in exchange for my expression of adoration for this new-to-me discovery.]

Growing Up

Yesterday I looked up and suddenly Josiah looked...tall. He and I had been playing a game with his alphabet flashcards, and when he stood up it was as if I was looking at him for the first time in a year, like a distant relative who lives far away and wants to pinch his formerly-chubby cheeks and give him the look-how-much-you've-grown and the-last-time-I-saw-you-you-were-this-big speeches.

But seriously. I think I may have gasped. And I almost started crying (which is a big shock to all of us, I'm sure).

This is my child who, six months ago, was weighed and measured and charted in the 10th percentile for his age. I have counted on him being small forever, but my picky eater is now beginning to ask for seconds (sometimes) and taking solid two- or three-hour naps (most days), which logically equals a growth spurt. For the last six months we have had to roll his 4T pants so they fit, but suddenly we don't have to anymore. And every night he says, "Daddy, let's wrestle. I ate protein today!"

He's growing!

To that realization I say both hooray! and boo!

Or perhaps he's been growing all along and it was just my perspective that changed yesterday because I knew I was about to register him for Kindergarten.

Which I did this morning.

Be still my heart.